As the agent responsible for security in my new home, I am constantly alert and vigilant, even when I look like I’m asleep and my paws are twitching like I’m chasing bunnies. So it should come as no surprise, then, that when I heard unusual noises coming from outside last night, I was instantly opening one eye while pretending to be sound asleep on the couch.
The sound was not one I have heard before during the last few weeks of my visit here, so it made me very curious. At first it sounded a little like the small decorative bells my humans have put in the fir tree they brought into the house a few days ago. They also placed all sorts of other colourful ornaments on the tree, each of which I have inspected for hidden cameras and other suspicious devices used by Canine Operators Not Totally Real Or Lovable, (CONTROL). I have no idea what the humans are up to with this tree and all the decorations, but then there is so much about these humans I don’t yet understand.
Anyway, the jingling sound from outside stopped, and I was about to pretend I was drifting back to sleep when I heard what sounded like someone walking on the roof of the house.
Now, I have learned there are many rules in my new home: no chewing on pillows, for some reason, and no helping myself to books from the bottom book shelf, even though I have only read half of Jack London’s “Call of the Wild” and still don’t know what happened to Buck, the dog. In light of all these rules, I was pretty sure that walking on the roof was a pretty big no-no.
I sat up, cocked my head to one side to hear better, and looked at the ceiling, trying to guess what the intruder was up to. The steps were moving across the roof towards the chimney.
Suddenly, there was a thump behind the fireplace screen, and as I watched in amazement, a short, heavy-set older man with a white beard was standing in my living room! The burglar was wearing a furry red hat, and had a red suit on with a big, black, leather belt. His clothing looked very odd, but then again my own humans also wear odd clothing sometimes, especially the male who is given to wearing something called “sweater-vests” in spite of what the female human says.
I was so surprised I couldn’t even bark. He looked at me, his blue eyes twinkling behind his small, round reading glasses, and then he winked at me and put his finger to his lips to indicate that I should be quiet, which I thought was pretty nervy for a home intruder. Then he reached into his pocket and pulled out a rawhide bone filled with something that looked very yummy and gave it to me, making me sit first, even though I tried not to. The bone was as yummy as it looked, and since my razor-sharp instincts immediately told me there was nothing wrong with it, I had a lick or two or three, and a little bite, determined to leave some of it as evidence.
The intruder had a large very colourful bag with him, and he proceeded to pull out some packages and place them around the tree. I chuckled to myself as I watched, thinking that he must be new at the burglary game because he was doing it all wrong, leaving stuff instead of taking it.
Then, he reached into his bag one last time, pulled out a big, red sock, and gave it to me.
“For brave little Agent M3,” he said with a big smile, scratching me behind the ears. “You have found a good home at last. Guard it well.” And as he straightened up and tightened up his bag, he chuckled softly: “Merry Christmas.” Then he placed his finger alongside his nose, winked, and vanished up the chimney again.
Were it not for the presents under the tree and the red sock full of all sorts of yummy secret agent treats, I would have thought it was all some sort of dream, or a trick being played by The Agency – Big Wag has an odd sense of humour some times. But I can still feel the comfortable spot where he scratched me behind the ears. For a home intruder, he was pretty nice.
I hope he comes again.
Yours,
Agent M3 – ever vigilant. And as the humans would say: Merry Christmas!
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1 comment:
Sniffle. This one made me cry...
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